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Veritas and Happpiness
Happiness, no matter how we define it, is the surest route to success. Happy people become successful, not the other way around. Successful people are not always happy. It is interesting that we place so much emphasis on success without a true attempt to determine its roots. No matter how we define happiness, it should be a focus of every school’s strategic discussion. It is no accident, then, that the word “happy” appears in our school’s Mission Statement.
Now we are faced with that rather existential and spiritual question: how do we become happy? This is a question that must be answered by each individual, and it requires time and thought. It is a spiritual quest of self-discovery. Whenever we talk about
Now we are faced with that rather existential and spiritual question: how do we become happy? This is a question that must be answered by each individual, and it requires time and thought. It is a spiritual quest of self-discovery. Whenever we talk about
university preparation I always mention spiritual preparation, and our Selwyn House vision—VERITAS—is, in fact, a spiritual quest. With a true understanding of this vision we can begin to answer the question: what do I have to do to be happy?
The first step has always been to attain the elusive goals of self-awareness and self-discovery, leading to self-respect and self-confidence. This is the first component of the VERITAS vision: Be True to Yourself. Happiness derives from knowing and believing in yourself, and ultimately advocating for yourself. As I continuously explain to the boys, this is called “growing up.” We must do
The first step has always been to attain the elusive goals of self-awareness and self-discovery, leading to self-respect and self-confidence. This is the first component of the VERITAS vision: Be True to Yourself. Happiness derives from knowing and believing in yourself, and ultimately advocating for yourself. As I continuously explain to the boys, this is called “growing up.” We must do
whatever we can at Selwyn House to empower our boys to be true to themselves. They must be allowed to battle, debate, suffer, be let down, experience failure, and to learn how to bounce back. Every setback is a chance for betterment. An uncluttered path does
not exist. We try our very best to make sure that each Selwyn boy is Known and Loved. We believe this will help each student develop higher self-esteem. In order to reach maturity, a man must journey through boyhood. This is unavoidable. Showing an alarming lack of judgment, being silly, goofy, unreasonable, demanding, self-absorbed and frustrating, are all components of boyhood that actually allow a boy to turn into a capable, responsible, hard-working caring, emotional diligent, mature and
loving man.
True happiness also requires a commitment to one’s family and friends. A recent Harvard University study on male happiness makes it quite clear about the direct correlation between a man’s happiness and the relationship he has with his mother, but we want all our boys to realize they need their entire family to support their quest for happiness.
Boys’ schools create magical friendships that last a lifetime. What a gift.
True happiness also requires a commitment to one’s family and friends. A recent Harvard University study on male happiness makes it quite clear about the direct correlation between a man’s happiness and the relationship he has with his mother, but we want all our boys to realize they need their entire family to support their quest for happiness.
Boys’ schools create magical friendships that last a lifetime. What a gift.
We must continually remind our boys that they need each other. A boys’ school thrives by teaching that friendships are everything, and that sustaining them requires effort, dedication, respect, empathy and, above all, kindness. Boys who develop empathy, and who are kind, will have fulfilling, lasting friendships, and that translates into happiness.
Finally, we always argue that true happiness requires the development of passion and a good old-fashioned work ethic. It doesn’t appear to be overly dependent on intelligence, it doesn’t require high levels of achievement, but it does require hard work. Here is a secret: Happy people don’t give up. Happiness seems to go hand-in-hand with resilience.
Self-awareness, focusing on families and friends, and recognizing the value of hard work define our commitment to VERITAS. It all seems so simple yet so real. Many schools attempt to define what a graduate of their institution should look like. At Selwyn House, we hope that what we have imparted to our graduates will be built upon by them for the rest of their lives. It’s our vision. We want all our boys to develop a lifelong commitment to Selwyn VERITAS. Our graduates need to be true to themselves, true to others and true to their school. The rest is merely commentary.
